Letter to a Friend

Hello, Carlos.

How’s life? It’s really great hearing from you once and again. Been quite some time since we last talked, eh?

It’s interesting that you mentioned ‘transpersonal psychology,’ because only recently did I happen to exposed myself to it- well, mostly with parapsychology stuff. As of lately I was really overwhelmed by the materialistic approach to human beings- that our consciousness is merely a product of our brain, and that there is no spirit, no afterlife, and that’s it. I was rather frightened by it, and have consumed a good chunk of my time reading up about various literature. I then read about the transpersonal psychology in Britain that deals with consciousness studies, and the theory of non-locality of our consciousness, and its attempt to justify it by using theory of quantum physic. I also read about mediums research in the past, scientific studies of reincarnation conducted worldwide (in US, University of Virginia has a department that studied reincarnation and near-death experience for over 50 years). Oh my, I sound quite like a superstitious freak, aren’t I? I can’t deny that I want to believe these things, but my logic and scientific side of me prevented me from taking that jump- I’m not absolutely convinced, as I myself have no direct experience of such things, and I doubt that in my life time we would be able to say conclusively whether there is afterlife or not. Anyway, I know that transpersonal psychology deals much more than the research of survival of consciousness- following the guidance of Carl Jung, as we attempt to understand a ‘spiritual’ aspect of human beings, whether we truly understand the purpose of ‘being spiritual’ or not. Some scientists even said that there is a gene that’s responsible for whether a person is spiritual or not! I do know this: that I cannot live without spiritual fulfillment. I am not happy with physical comfort or luxury. I need something more. And the only place I can find it is from within- in my mind, in my heart, and in my ‘soul.’ I don’t know if there is a soul that is separate from our physical body, but I do know that without such thing (or delusion, as some scientists and atheists would say), I cannot survive.

I guess the reason I’m saying all these to you right now is because you happened to contact me, and mentioned to me about your interest in transpersonal psychology- a part of me sees it as a sign, and another part of me sees it as a coincidence- that I’m seeing more than there is. And you mentioned of the song you wrote- which I listened. Ironically, I also have some anger issue I have to deal with, and hearing that song, and hearing you mentioned about that conversation that we had- well, it reminded me of who I used to be- and I wonder why I had gone astray from it. I feel smarter, yet my heart becomes more clingy and plagued by attachments and void. Age has to do with it, I supposed.

If the world is what science claims to be- physical, non-spiritual, and meaningless- then I still choose love- like your lyric said: “I wanted something to love more than something to hate.”

In the end, it’s only love that gives me a reason to take that next breath of air, feeling alive.

Blessed be